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How many children per parent is "respectful" to other pax or even doable?

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Taezar

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I ask because today there was one parent w 3 children under 8, the two eldest were fighting, complaining, yelling to their parent and the youngest was a post toddler-too big for a bassinet (though they tried and the child fell through but was allowed to stay in).
Obviously there are multiple factors at play, but I am curious just how many young ones one parent can manage on a flight.
Taez.
 

The Rok

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Some parents can’t manage ANY children and shouldn’t even be allowed to own a goldfish, others can easily manage 6 kids. I think it comes down to the individual parent and their parenting/discipline skills.
 

nlagalle

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Some parents can’t manage ANY children and shouldn’t even be allowed to own a goldfish, others can easily manage 6 kids. I think it comes down to the individual parent and their parenting/discipline skills.

Totally agree with this statement.. it all comes down to how they parent their kids. If they are lax on the discipline at home then it will be evident on the flight!
 

thewinchester

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As a personal rule of thumb, 1 child per parent when <12 IMHO. Allowance should only be increased if the parent has adequate skills to look after them (which sadly the number of parents with same is in the minority).

I remember a flight QF ADL-PER daytime flight in 2004 aboard a 767, about 80% load. NB at the time, and managed to be assigned a window seat mid-cabin with a space next to me. Seated in that row was a mother with a <6mth infant. Before pushback, cabin staff approached and asked if I didn't mind being moved as the female with infant was supposed to be assigned a whole row to herself. Being a cooperative type, I happily obliged.

Sadly this meant I was moved to the very last row, seated next to a mother whose parenting skills were non-existent, and her 3yr old brat.

The <6mth infant was an angel the entire flight, didn't cry once and made life easy for her very nice mother whom I had the pleasure of speaking to before moving. Sadly, the 3yr brat was just that - throwing food onto the floor and at/towards other pax, constantly bumping me whilst I was working on my laptop (in the days where laptops were still hulking plastic house bricks), up and down like nobody's business. And of course his mother lacked any parenting skills to do something about it.

Finally I lost my patience after 2hrs. I looked at him over the top of my glasses and with my near scariest but non threatening look, this 20 something guy put the fear of god into the child telling him that it's not nice to bump people constantly and throw food at people, and that he should stay seated like a good boy and play with his toys.

This thankfully bought me about 20min of peace and bump-free working, until the inconsiderate soul in front reclined their seat without warning - thrusting 3.5kgs of ABS plastic moulded laptop straight into my stomach :evil:

You win some, you lose some.
 

medhead

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Mum flew BNE-ADL the other week and it sounds like you got the same group. In J row 1, 2 older kids fighting and crying and screaming sat next to each other mother and younger child on the other side of the aisle. Mum basically said why didn't the mum sit with one of the older kids to separate them.

Apparently, one the the kids screamed because there was tomato with their breakfast and the mum sat there and did jack squat all. CSM had to remove it. :shock:
 

Pu Koh

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Another reason why people should need approval from me before they're allowed to have children
 

JohnPhelan

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Apparently, one the the kids screamed because there was tomato with their breakfast and the mum sat there and did jack squat all. CSM had to remove it. :shock:

Did the CSM 'accidentally' drop the soggy tomato on the kid's head whilst removing it, by chance ?? :)
 

harvyk

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Apparently, one the the kids screamed because there was tomato with their breakfast and the mum sat there and did jack squat all. CSM had to remove it. :shock:

As a parent of some kids who are very fussy when eating, I can sympathise with the parent. Typically at home our method is to not remove food and let the kids cry it out, it can be annoying, but rarely lasts more than a few minutes, and they are slowly getting used to the idea of simply pushing and food they do not like to one side.

That said - Whilst sitting in a plane, it is not the time or place to make a stand against the kids! Keeping peace and quite is the order of the day as far as I'm concerned. (Which is why we took food which we knew the kids would like on our last trip, that way when they pushed lunch aside, we had something else to give them)
 
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Justchecking

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What's with kids screaming when they don't get their way? Any kind of outburst in public would have been off to bed with no tv or dinner that night. I was fed stuff I didn't like daily and it was eat it or go hungry.
I just don't understand this whole situation quite honestly. Sure my childhood didn't exactly nurture my 'specialness' but I learnt throwing a tantrum in public wasn't the way to go about life.
 

medhead

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As a parent of some kids who are very fussy when eating, I can sympathise with the parent. Typically at home our method is to not remove food and let the kids cry it out, it can be annoying, but rarely lasts more than a few minutes, and they are slowly getting used to the idea of simply pushing and food they do not like to one side.

Sounds like a good way to approach the problem. But not on an aircraft, as you say. Based on mum guesstimate of their age, I would have requested a kids meal. Of course, my children are not entirely fussy eater, my oldest child taught herself to eat olives at 2 just because we ate them. But my wife's younger siblings are in their 20s and still get pandered to by their mum. :confused:
 

harvyk

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What's with kids screaming when they don't get their way? Any kind of outburst in public would have been off to bed with no tv or dinner that night. I was fed stuff I didn't like daily and it was eat it or go hungry.
I just don't understand this whole situation quite honestly. Sure my childhood didn't exactly nurture my 'specialness' but I learnt throwing a tantrum in public wasn't the way to go about life.

<rant parent="yes" kids="3">

Welcome to parenting in the 21st century...

My personal view on parenting is that it's my responsibility to turn my kids into responsible members of society, thus I will use what ever methods is at my disposal (and yes that includes smacking, raising my voice, sending kids to naughty corner and the most heinous of crimes, saying NO)...

But if you listen to some armchair experts on the matter, even saying the word no is a no no. ("No should not be part of your vocabulary" is what is written in half the books I've read and subsequently tossed out) The problem is that these same armchair experts believe you can use adult reasoning with kids, and never punish kids lest you damage their fragile egos...

The big problem is leaving discipline to one side is a very easy option for some parents (the experts all agree with them), which is why we see so many little (replace this with strong language), who have no respect for anyone or anything.

The way I see it, I was smacked, yelled at, sent to naughty corner and heard the word no frequently when I was a kid, and as far as I'm concerned I've turned out ok (no criminal record, decent job, productive member of society) and harbour no ill feeling towards my parents as a result.

</rant>
 

Mal

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Timely thread. Sitting on the tarmac delayed. I believe the issue is a parent has brought on more than the infant/young child limit or there is a similar issue.


Captain explained it as a paperwork issue. We did take off after much discussion between staff and numerous trips back into the cabin.


Sent from my GT-I9100 using AustFreqFly
 
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Reggie

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As the parent of a 2.5 and 17 year old, the answer to the OP's question is "0", "zero", "nil", "zilch"
 

Mal

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There is an official limit?

There is a limit to the number of pax in a row (oxygen mask limits, seating limits).
Airlines have a limit to the number of children under 2 that a parent can bring onboard (believe it's one per adult >16 unless the parent is 14 or 15).
Airlines also have limits as to the number of unaccompanied minors on each flight.

Not sure, but believe there is also a rule how many children (2-12 type age) a parent can supervise.

Not going to dig up the rules around it tonight, but they should be on the CASA site somewhere.
 

anat0l

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The way I see it, I was smacked, yelled at, sent to naughty corner and heard the word no frequently when I was a kid, and as far as I'm concerned I've turned out ok (no criminal record, decent job, productive member of society) and harbour no ill feeling towards my parents as a result.

Same - had all that, got the strap, slapped, shaken - can't get away with that these days, especially if your munchkins are watching the prime time criminal shows. Also, my dad would never take sides when my sister and I had an argument - it was both of our faults every time and we both were punished.

Of course now we're grown up he rarely raises his belt at us, but his cynicism and ability to use guilt can make you feel like your heart is literally being squeezed by his bare hands at times.


To answer the question at hand, generally the answer is no limit (except that required by CASA - but that's a different level). Generally, I would remark that one parent not keeping a child under control is not acceptable (i.e. they are not making any effort), and two parents with an equally futile attitude is a serious compounding of that judgement. On the other hand, a single parent keeping a child under control is good; with two parents also good, and with more kids than parents (especially one), if the kids are well-behaved, that's worthy of a gold star.

I know perhaps one day I'll eat my words when I have my own children.........
 

Moody

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I know perhaps one day I'll eat my words when I have my own children.........

Unlikely. In my experience former armchair critics of those with kids have no compunction with doing U-turns when they themselves procreate. I should know.


All I could suggest is that anyone travelling with children should be sent an advanced passenger information request. This will ask questions like :-

  • Have you discussed the trip with your children? Do they understand what will happen in the airport and on-board?
  • Are there any special dietary requirements and have you ordered children's meals and brought spare snacks?
  • Have you packed some activities and favourite toys in your carry-on?
  • Have you selected appropriate seats and/or rung the airline to arrange?
  • If travelling long-haul have you thought about sleep times and tactics?
  • Are you really sure you want to do this to yourself?????
I've done a four big O/S trips with the kids and with a lot of preparation and a little luck they have all gone pretty well. Just one leg from hell returning to Sydney with missy2 on my lap, and that was our fault for thinking an over-tired toddler would go straight to sleep. Quite the opposite as it turns out.

So next time you find yourself in the blast area of a toxic toddler, why don't you put all your fantastic knowledge to good use and help the parent(s) out. Could be a win/win result and certainly more productive than bleating about it here.
 

amaroo

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Dec we did J LHR-MAD...we shared the cabin with amongst others a mother, nanny & three kids with the oldest around 6.

The kids were fine but the nanny was struggling.....I watched the mum handle all three while the poor nanny looked completely out of her depth. It seemed to me that the kids knew who the boss was and were not going to take any notice of anyone else.

Felt for the young nanny as she tried everything in the book to entertain the kids but until they were sitting next to mum, it all counted for nothing.

AM
 
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