How I got my family out of a travel mess, and how it blew up on me

drcam

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In early March of 2026, my elderly parents were booked on a cruise from Thailand to Mumbai on Oceania Cruises. They allowed themselves only one night at the end of the cruise before flying onto Barcelona, for which they had purchased J tickets with EK, where they would join a Viking cruise only 3 days after the conclusion of their first cruise.
Unusually for my risk-averse parents who are nearing 80, neither of them purchased insurance beyond medical insurance (and for their age they were very fit). So it happened that they were only one night before the end of their first cruise in India when EK suddenly texted them to tell them their flight from Mumbai to Barcelona the following day was cancelled.

At this point, they were looking at a more than 60k loss between them if their second cruise ticket wasn't going to be used. My father tried desperately in the middle of the night to somehow find a way of getting from Mumbai to Spain, possibly via Africa, but found no good solution. They really wanted to stay in business class and have the least disruption in terms of time and finances. Eventually, my mother texted me just as I woke up and I spent the whole morning, with great difficulty, trying to find them an acceptable itinerary.

There were virtually no good options. The only way that was remotely acceptable involved backtracking from Mumbai to Guangzhou on Vietnam Airlines as a one way, and then booking a return ticket on Egypt Airlines from Guangzhou to Barcelona, forfeiting the return leg of their Mumbai-Sydney flight and buying a new ticket from Guangzhou to Sydney. This was settled on, and, after EK actually refunded them the entire cancel ticket plus an extra $1500 (!), they had minimal financial losses and they managed to get to Barcelona on the morning of the date of the second cruises's departure. They mentioned that service was surprisingly good on VN and the lounge had lovely food in Hanoi, as did the lounge in CAN. But Egypt Airlines was not exactly on par with the other Arabian business class products, with an angle flat bed and even the dreaded middle seat (which they luckily avoided) in business class. They made it to Europe in one piece and safely back to Guangzhou.

As I had gone back to China to go tomb sweeping for my Nana and Pop on Qing-Ming festival (Easter Sunday or April 5), and they were arriving in CAN just before that, I decided to spend a few days with my mum and dad in Guangzhou. I was originally going on a 4-month trip but I needed to go back to Australia briefly in the month of April. This was where things turned decidedly sour. During these three days, I was constantly treated like a little, immature child, and it was akin to being on house arrest. I felt no sense of family, no warmth, no love from my parents. I had bought them gifts generously from my travels, and I had sacrificed my own choice to order entrees that they liked. And yet I was constantly told to behave, remember to brush my teeth and put my seat belt on, as if I was a little child, there was no affection in their tone of voices. Of course, there had not been any ever. I visited my parents out of responsibility and respect for the commandment to honour one's father and mother, not out of any love or anticipation of joy. But who would have thought that my dad would announce that he would disinherit me without a single farthing!

I still believe that I did the right thing in rescuing my parents out of India. Any child who had the ability to do so would have done it, and had I been even two hours late there might not have been any acceptable solution (except for them to endure a very long time in whY with a third world airline at best, or simply miss out altogether at worst). This has left a very sour taste in my mouth. My Asian friends tell me that this is unavoidable, but I have seen how my extended family operate and they don't treat their children like that. I am currently at the end of my tether and well, I'm out of words.
 
So sorry to hear this. But unfortunately it is common for Asian parents to expect their kids for the world, and shows no gratitude. They believe that you owe them forever since they raised you up. So you are forever indebted to them.

This would be even worse if they paid to send you to Australia to study, or buy a house etc.
 
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"This would be even worse if they paid to send you to Australia to study"

Unfortunately, my situation is unique as the median Asian "tiger parent" sacrifices a lot of their money for their children's advancement. My parents did not. I was taught to live the life of an ascetic pauper so as to not be materialistic, even if they earned a six-figure income. The worst of both worlds.
 
"This would be even worse if they paid to send you to Australia to study"

Unfortunately, my situation is unique as the median Asian "tiger parent" sacrifices a lot of their money for their children's advancement. My parents did not. I was taught to live the life of an ascetic pauper so as to not be materialistic, even if they earned a six-figure income. The worst of both worlds.

Likewise for my better half. She did not get money either from her parents. It took time to reset their expectations, and I mean years.

Are you the only child? Also are you married with kids? Them having grandkids helps a bit. You can have "more excuses".
 

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