Around this time one of the hosts must have overheard us talking or just picked up the vibe from the table. She asked if there was anything wrong...
Basically, we were enjoying the food and wine, but some of the staff were displaying skills more in-tune with what you might expect at the corner deli. Since she asked, I told her about the general attitude after we requested to sit at another table, minimal engagement, no explanation of each course / wine, and the general disappointment of being asked if we were celebrating anything after going to the trouble of telling the restaurant this weeks ago.
She appeared shocked, surprised and disappointed - all at once. After some discussion / explanation she apologised and left us to continue the meal. I was going to say something at the end of the meal ... but given the interest, I thought why not now! I was polite. calm, and went out of my way to praise one particular waiter that was the total opposite to his peers ..... believe it or not, she said he was new and still in training.
So another nail in the gratuity-free concept, the older more experienced ones couldn't give a rats / slack attitude, the new blood not having served sufficient time to be adjusted / lose interest provided the best service.