Not all crews control the windows on the 787. I do agree though it is annoying.
I would say this the last one I was on, while only a MEL-SYD hop at lunchtime, the crew only half dimmed the windows during fliht, and it actually was quite pleasant imo. Not too much glare but not too dark so people couldn't look out. A nice balance.
Don't get me wrong, I do feel pax should have the choice for what works for them (as long as they're not the only window opener in the dark cabin village - though I guess that is what eye masks are for).
Anyway I would have no real issue in the A330 for transpac (in J) given the suite is more or less the same as that on the 787 and (reconfig) A380 so that experience is not so bad. The limited loos though, that could definitely be an issue... in Y, the 2 side seats can work better. There's no PE on those birds though, so that is an issue.