AFF "Concrete France" Trip 2014

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TonyHancock

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Due to overwhelming* demand I am attempting to set up a trip to France to concrete over it.^

June 2014 would seem to be the earliest the "event" could be held given some of the "unique" logistical requirements.

The plan is to gather in MEL, with a stay at the HSW, prior to taking QF9 to DXB, this will provide an excellent opportunity for some F lounging at MEL. Rather than head straight through on QF9 a switch to QF1 will be made at DXB to give sufficient F lounge time there. :cool:

A380.jpg

Following a shower, all round freshen up, and breakfast in the AA arrivals lounge a luxury coach service will be provided to The Hilton at Dartford River Crossing.

AFF-Bus.jpg

Evening festivities will include drinking 13 pints of Spitfire Ale and dining on cottage pie and chips.

The luxury coach will depart early the next morning and head for Dover where it will board a chartered cross channel ferry. The Ferry will already be loaded with a fleet of luxury concrete mixers and a squadron of Tiger tanks.~

Mixer-Fleet.jpg Tiger.jpg

The Ferry will head to Calais`where an unopposed disembarkation is to be expected. An advance party of AFF officials will have handed out white flags for the locals to wave.

Ferry2.jpg

The concreting will begin immediately and is expected to be completed as far as Paris by May 2018.

This is the trip of a lifetime for Francophobes. All food and accommodation in the UK is included in the price, whilst in France itself it can just be taken from the locals.

Initial cost estimates are around AUS$1,500,000 per person"...and this might sound expensive...but this is likely to be a 10 year exercise so all in all it represents excellent# value for money, when you consider flights, concrete mixer hire, ferry hire, Tiger tank hire, and UK accommodation and food is included.

This is an advance post to guage interest.

In line with AFF rules I am obliged to link to the guidelines for the collection of funds for an AFF event and they can be found here. Unfortunately given the unique and bloody expensive nature of this event these guidelines will not be followed and all payments will need to be made into my Ecuadorian Bank Account.


*Overwhelming is such a subjective term.
^Excluding the better vineyards, sites of British and German military victories, Commonwealth War Grave sites, and any other bit we might like to keep for ourselves.
~Whilst every effort will be made to complete the concreting without using brute force a squadron of Tiger tanks will be provided "just in case".
`Unfortunately chartering a ferry to the Normandy beaches was not possible due to landing issues.
#Excellent is such a subjective term
"Price does not include cement, sand, gravel and water.
:p For the more literal this is not a real event but an attempt at the sort of bigoted humour that we all thought had died out in the 1970's.



Brought to you by the National Association of of Concrete Mixers, in conjunction with the Keep France British Foundation.
 
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AaronBradford

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Ooh, sounds fun. I'd confirm as Platinum for this event, however I'm a bit concerned that cement, sand, gravel and water costs will blow out. Do you think these, too, can be taken from the locals? Put be down as Gold for now.
 
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robd

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Regarding payment - If you can please confirm that your Ecuadorian Bank accept Wish Gift Cards (discounted) or Westfield XS cards, I'm in!
 

TonyHancock

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I was also planning an archery session with the traditional Longbow on day one of the trip. These days French volunteers for target practice are much harder to find than in the 14th and 15th centuries. :p
 

Peabody

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I would love to attend however upon closer inspection of the wonderful itinerary I have noticed that this trip involves a considerable amount of time in Paris.

I 'm sorry I cannot attend to support this fantastic cause. I could not bring myself to visit a city as horrible as Paris again, even if the visit was purely for the purpose of concreting it over. Please count me as platinum for the trip to Dover where I will turn around before the ferry ride to hell.

I would happily provide financial support to those continuing the trip, perhaps the money could be put towards extra concrete supplies.

I look forward to seeing the pictures in the trip reports.
 
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Limewood

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Mrs Lime loves concreting she'll probably go, me, can't to busy looking after myself.
 

RooFlyer

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I suggest you enlist the assistance of the US Air Force. They appear to have developed a unique 'concrete bomb', demonstrated recently in Australia: Concrete bombs dropped in QLD

I wouldn't worry about getting a lift with them, the A380 sounds a better option for that, but the good 'ol USAF could carpet concrete bomb those places that the concrete mixers can't get to.

What's the campaign's policy on concreting over Champagne caves?
 

TheEmu

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I think this may been tried a couple of times in the past?
I'll see if I can find some notes on the subject from the last chap who had a crack at it - he may have overplayed his hand a bit when using those Tigers.
At 1.5 mil the cost of a slab has obviously gone up a bit but all-in-all a solid idea, TonyHancock - love your form(work).
Hopefully I'll be able to cement a spot in the touring party.
 

Happy Trails

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I sense an opportunity to make a killing here.
Time to corner the market in white flags.
 

TonyHancock

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I have been somewhat taken aback by the amount of interest in this once in a life opportunity. Many of you have asked what the end result will look like, and luckily enough I was able to experiment on a recent trip to Montreal...

Montreal.jpg
Montreal on Google Maps
 

HarryB

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Has concrete reinforcing mesh been taken into account in your costs? We wouldn't want to give any if the cheese eating surrender monkeys the chance to burrow through the newly poured slab, would we?
 

Mak404matt

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Has concrete reinforcing mesh been taken into account in your costs? We wouldn't want to give any if the cheese eating surrender monkeys the chance to burrow through the newly poured slab, would we?

Should help Tony bring up the price of steel as well, thus providing him J class travel evermore.
 

docjames

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Please describe how dog poo on the newly laid cement will be avoided?
 

robd

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Has concrete reinforcing mesh been taken into account in your costs? We wouldn't want to give any if the cheese eating surrender monkeys the chance to burrow through the newly poured slab, would we?

Given the volatility of the AUD, perhaps we should hedge some funds? I'm guessing, the purchases won't be funded in FRA as EUR? Then again, the 28 degree MC should be ok whether funded in EUR or GBP.
 
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