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A bit of humour

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Major

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Everyone seems to be in such a hurry to scream 'racism' these days.

A customer asked, "In what aisle could I find the Guinness?"

The shop assistant asks, "Are you Irish?"

The guy, clearly offended, says, "Yes I am. But let me ask you something,

If I had asked for Italian sausage, would you ask me if I was Italian?

Or if I had asked for German Bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German?

Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish?

Or if I had asked for a Taco, would you ask if I was Mexican?

Or if I asked for Polish sausage, would you ask if I was Polish?"

The shop assistant says, "No, I probably wouldn't."

The guy says, "Well then, because I asked for Guinness, why did you ask me if I'm Irish?"

The clerk replied, "Because you're in Bunnings'."
 

codash1099

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Marketing 101

You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say, "I'm fantastic in bed".

That's Direct Marketing.
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You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and get her telephone number. The next day you call and say, "Hi, I'm fantastic in bed".

That's Telemarketing.
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You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl. One of your friends goes up to her and, pointing at you, says, "He's fantastic in bed".

That's Advertising.
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You're at a party and see a gorgeous girl. You get up and straighten your tie; you walk up to her and pour her a drink. You open the door for her, pick up her bag after she drops it, offer her a ride, and then say, "By the way, I'm fantastic in bed".

That's Public Relations.
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You're at a party and see a gorgeous girl. She walks up to you and says, "I hear you're fantastic in bed".

That's Brand Recognition.
 

Captain Halliday

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Completing the latest Red Planet survey, I thought this was a typo.

3277CC18-44F9-4F71-99F1-00056262BB0C.jpeg


But it kept appearing, so maybe someone at Singapore Loyalty once told a fib to someone at Qantas Loyalty.;)


2D216A8B-E451-4A13-9387-2EF45E4FB82F.jpeg
 

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