My top peeves:
- Fidgets: Sorry, two straight hours of you sitting behind me clicking a pen - be grateful that I'm only turning my head around and giving you a dressing down and not dropping hot coffee on your delicates.
- Badly behaved kids (my strategy for dealing with them is a few para's down): If you're flying with kids, come prepared. Have a bottle, a blankey, cherished toy and some activities which aren't going to make a mess and crowd everyone's space.
And FFS make sure the little ones are as tired as hell when they get on so they use the plane as naptime. I don't care if it stuffs up their body clocks, that's your problem after we land.
- Excessive drinkers: Sorry, you should not even think about consuming 7 of those mini-bottles of wine on a 4hr flight - that's what we call a drunk.
- Bad bathroom users: Someone already said it, sit down if you're not sure everything (and I mean everything - pubic hair included) is going to make it into the cistern. I've already mentioned my recent complaint about cleaning on the new QF Domestic A330's in the QF grumbles thread.
- DIKWIA's. Enough said.
Have experienced 3 recent Body Odour issues that have me questioning the hygiene of the average traveller.<snip>
There is no excuse for bad B.O. on planes, full stop. Seriously, how hard is it to carry a small roll-on, or swing by BigW or Newslink and pick up a travel sized aerosol deodorant.
I know if I've got a few flights scheduled, I do my fellow pax the favour of carrying a change of clothes and make good use of the QP showers at least once.
My pet hates, in no particular order and there are quite a few, are:
1. People with iPods who think everyone else in the cabin enjoys their choice of noise.
This applies to all modes of transportation. So many times I've resisted the temptation to pull out a pair of scissors and cut the headphone wires just to make a point (and provide something to hang them with)
4. The people who stand almost on top of the luggage carousel, thereby blocking everyone else from getting their bag off.
Agreed, another of my personal pet peeves. I make a point of standing halfway up the carousel at least a meter back from the belt. Anyone who tries to cut in front of me is given a stare that'll turn most of them into stone. Try it a second time, and there's usually a comment to a travelling companion along the lines of "geez, pushing in front of someone isn't going to make the bags come any faster."
We were on a MEL-PER flight a couple of years ago. A woman and a child boarded and the child headed straight to a window seat. His mother grabbed him and put him in the seat they were allocated which was in the middle row. Well, the child screamed and screamed for at least 20 minutes...
Been there, done that
I will tolerate this for a while, but I will get to the point of actually saying something - to the kid which will embarrass the parents to no end and have fellow pax giggling like school girls.
Suggestion: "Hi there (big smile on face). Listen, I know your a little boy/girl, and I feel really sorry for you because your mummy/daddy didn't bring you up right and teach you important skills like discipline and self control. You'll be off the flight soon, and I'm sure we can arrange for child services to pick you up at the other end and have you placed with someone who actually cares about you as a person and wants you to grow up into a nice, kind and respectful person."
The kids parents will want to kill you after that, but at least they'll be embarrassed enough to put a stop to the little brat's behaviour.
My boss who I spent most of last week with, was telling me a story of when he lived in Nth W China in 1997-99 and an internal Chinese flight - his comment was "you didn't want to touch anything on the aircraft, very ordinary, but the worst part was not long after take off, 2 Chinese gents proceeded to remove a canine carcass from the bottom of a carry on box and proceed to carve it up in the isle..."
And you just took the award for grossest thing ever, at least from what's been posted on this thread.
My big one is people who are in economy and turn around in their seat to talk to people in the row behind (yes i'm talking to you mr seat 17B on QF608 12Jan). nothing is more annoying when QF actually give you a good breakfast and some noob turn around and shoves their rear in my face.
Like people who play their personal music devices out their headphones at 11, this is another offence worthy of hanging.
Talk to the person next to you, across the aisle is fine. Turn your head around slightly if you must talk to the person behind you - but keep that backside square and firm in your seat lest I see plumbers crack and drop something rather uncomfortable down there.
I get absolutely hacked off with FIFO Parasites who sit at the bar getting slowly pissed, then can't be bothered boarding with everyone else constantly causing delays.
Said everything I have to say on the HiViz Brigade so many times now its not funny. Can't stand the worst of them who make life hell for the rest of us.
And why, why, why do people have to recline their seat on a SYD-MEL flight? Especially on JQ where the seat pitch is abysmal.:evil:
Agreed, shoot them I say - or get a water bottle shoved into the side of the seat to stop them beforehand.
