Travel and relationships ... Tips and trivia

[Deleted member 29185]

As I sit here at DT-CNS, trying to telephone my wife at HSW (who is most likely socialising in the lounge), I got to thinking that an AFF thread about surviving work travel may be a good idea!

The matriarch of the swanning_it clan, (my mother) quite happily espouses that we have the ideal marriage ... As we don't have to put up with each other constantly :shock:

So what stories, fables and lessons are out there from which to learn?

 

[craven morehead]

Me thinks me must read Freud before replying ......!!

 

[Deleted member 29185]

Me thinks me must read Freud before replying ......!!

Funny you mention that, as I was thinking Freud would have a field day with me!

 

[Deleted member]

I suspect your mum may have a point. Mrs GPH and I have lived, worked and socialized together for our entire married life. We actually enjoy holidays (not all of them) apart.

 

[leadman]

One of the most sobering points my wife made many years ago was when I first got her the Gold Companion card with QF. I proudly gave it to her and her reply still rings true today. She told me I can stick that card "where the sun don't shine" because every time she opened her wallet the card would remind her how many birthdays, kids school specials, public holidays, anniversaries, etc., I had missed in our marriage. And count another one this Tuesday with Melbourne Cup day as I will be in the US.

 

[dandandandan]

My constant traveling has had no negative impact on my current relationship, luckily!
My gf always tells me that it keeps her missing me which is nice and she feels that she gets to live her own life when I'm away which is nice for her also.
But I try to keep things balanced by being very firm with work/clients about when I can and cannot travel. Important dates I will always put on annual leave/time in lieu to ensure I'm home.
My home life will always come first as I've neglected it for work in previous relationships and they have not turned out so well.
But hey, you live and learn right?

 

[JohnK]

The secret to a successful marriage is to live in different countries....

 

[Deleted member]

The secret to a successful marriage is to live in different countries....

Probably the smartest thing you've ever said (lol)

 

[Timtammi]

I suspect your mum may have a point. Mrs GPH and I have I suspect your mum may have a point. Mrs GPH and I have lived, worked and socialized together for our entire married life. We actually enjoy holidays (not all of them) apart.

Mr Timtammi and I have lived, worked and socialized together for our entire married life. We actually enjoy holidays (not all of them) together!

Actually I can only think of 2 times I have holidayed without him since we got married, once when I went to a health farm for a week (not sure that is everyone's idea of a holiday!) and once when I went OS to Europe with my Mum..
It can be challenging at times to spend so much time together but I cant imagine it any other way!
I should also add that we almost always travel together for work as well..

 

[oh_lol]

All I know is travelling with a partner quickly identified if I wanted to keep her around

 

[Deleted member 29185]

All I know is travelling with a partner quickly identified if I wanted to keep her around

And ... what was the outcome?

 

[NZflygirl]

All I know is travelling with a partner quickly identified if I wanted to keep her around

My dad actually said that to me once. I'm not sure how true it is as I wanted to give my +1 the boot!:shock:

Decided to keep him and train him up instead.

Now I think he's my favourite travel companion

 

[Timtammi]

All I know is travelling with a partner quickly identified if I wanted to keep her around

I think this is very true. In fact, I think I knew DH was "the one" by travelling with him

 

[oh_lol]

And ... what was the outcome?

Happily single and never engaged/married!
Travelling really does show someones true character.

 

[Pushka]

One of the most sobering points my wife made many years ago was when I first got her the Gold Companion card with QF. I proudly gave it to her and her reply still rings true today. She told me I can stick that card "where the sun don't shine" because every time she opened her wallet the card would remind her how many birthdays, kids school specials, public holidays, anniversaries, etc., I had missed in our marriage. And count another one this Tuesday with Melbourne Cup day as I will be in the US.

Ouch.
MrP travels, a lot. Always has done on sporting tours, then Olympic Games multiple times plus associated travel, then in our business. He was usually away when big stuff happened. Eg when house was broken into, dog became seriously ill and needed to be put to sleep, older son needing emergency care in hospital due to encephalitis etc.

But when he was 22 and we'd just been married he developed aggressive cancer that had metasized. I figured from then on he could travel when he wanted and I could deal with it.

And now I am doing the same to him - travelling with and without him.

 

[takenbyaliens]

I have been seriously travelling since 1999. Usually away around 6 months a year. At first my wife would join me for some parts of trips. I was working for a school and the Head was very comfortable with the occurring as long as I did my work etc. Worked well. When I started my own venture in 2008 we began a new pattern. I travel without her for work. We travel together once a year ( either O/S or in the Outback ). She travels O/S once a year with a friend ( EG US, Europe ) for around 3-4 weeks doing some things on her bucket list. I do somethings on my bucket list ( but not on hers ) like Iceland this year and Xinjiang/Silk Road next year. The Xinjiang trip comes immediately after we have done Alaska and west coast USA both cruising and in RVs together. With retirement looming things are likely to change as we still have lots to do on our shared bucket list. All goes well although invariably when I am away things break down/burn out etc etc....