@Seat0B I'm so sorry for the predicament you find yourself in whilst endeavouring to provide care and support for your mother. The aged care system is truly broken.
I had been following your journey and seeing it as a portent for myself and my mother. I have been supporting her to remain in her own home for the last 5 years since my dad passed away.
I was having growing niggles of concern about how well she really was coping and was planning to have some discussions with her about 'future plans and options'.
Sadly though last week I found her deceased at home. The shock was overwhelming. Whilst I thought she needed more support at home, she really had been managing well and at 90 was doing better than expected and that we would have at least another couple of years together. It would appear that she has experienced a medical episode and the coroner may identify something.
Mum didn't want residential aged care, she didn't want to be ill and decline slowly (who does) she wanted to die in her own home. So it would seem that she got what she wanted.
It might sound awful, but as heartbroken as I am at losing her, in some ways it seems like her final gift to me was not having to navigate the residential aged care system.
I know you will continue to cherish your mum whilst you have her and make the most of your time together
