A bit of humour

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The wife was counting all the 10 and 20 cent coins out on the kitchen table when she suddenly got very angry and started shouting and crying for no reason.

I thought to myself, “She’s going through the change.”
 
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Upon hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Katie went straight to her grandparent's house to visit her 95 year-old grandmother and comfort her. When she asked how her grandfather had died, her grandmother replied, "He had a heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning."

Horrified, Katie told her grandmother that 2 people nearly 100 years old having sex would surely be asking for trouble. "Oh no, my dear," replied granny. "Many years ago, realizing our advanced age, we figured out the best time to do it was when the church bells would start to ring. It was just the right rhythm.

Nice and slow and even. Nothing too strenuous, simply in on the Ding and out on the Dong." She paused to wipe away a tear, and continued, "He'd still be alive if the ice cream truck hadn't come along."
 
Bought the wife a fridge for her birthday. You should have seen her face light up when she opened it.

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I knew this guy with a wooden leg who was in a relationship with a woman who made her own whiskey.

She broke it off, but he was in love with her still.

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Last month there were only four Wiggles. Now there are eight. At this rate of exponential growth the majority of the earth’s population will be Wiggles by February 2024. We must act now to flatten the curve.
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